Being a photographer grants me an unparalleled view into the souls of those I photograph. This is both a blessing and a curse. I have a considerable knack for reading people; albeit sometimes I’m way off. I get to see how these people think, what they think of themselves, and how they treat others. There are times where being a photographer is no different than being a bartender listening to the wonderings that go on. There are also times where I myself feel used. I’m a generous person. I always have been. I also am someone who somehow absorbs negative thinking. It’s draining. More than a 10km run, negative thoughts, just kill me. I’ve lived for a long time feeling like I was put here to make people happy even at great sacrifice to myself. I’ve shot for free yes, many a time. During those shoots, more often than not the idea of a shot is mine. But there are times that it becomes not mine. And that’s when I feel I’m just taken advantage of. It’s annoying. No, that’s not the right word. It downright pisses me off. People have lost the ability to be grateful it seems. Not all people, but a fair majority.
Photography is something I do because I love it. Because I can connect to it’s inner workings. Get in the way of that love and I don’t want to work with you. Take advantage of me by hounding me for shots, not respecting my creative process, become greedy… and it might be the last time we shoot. Being anxious, being excited… that’s one thing. And trust me, I’m just as excited. But coming after me months after asking, when… or … I only got X number. I want more. ugh. You’ve just gone from a shoot I would likely revisit AND likely have more from to a shoot that I’ll never look at again.